FEMINISM AND GENDER EQUALITY

My granddaughter recently posted to Facebook  comments on the Gender Equality issue at her High School--a controversy over blue graduation gowns for boys and white for girls.

The editor of our local newspaper (the Coastal Journal) recently replied with a strong put down of the kids who objected to the gender related colors. The following is my reply to her.

__________________________

To The Editor
"Blue or white; who cares?" you asked rhetorically in your 4/14 editorial. I will answer as if you were really asking.

I care. I am 70, and in the 70's I worked for Womens Equality. Not for "equality" per se, as many did, but i wanted Womens Rights. I worked for women's  legal and spiritual rights.

Today the young people work for Gender Equality, at Morse Highschool and all around the world. Morse students recently  expressed this in their protest over gender based graduation gown colors.

Now, to me, equality in both movements  suggests that both genders are the same, and while I accept that both genders share a common humanity, I felt and still feel that there are valuable  differences.

These differences have expressed themselves culturally as 2 different paradigms.

The first paradigm is so big and so bright that it is hard to see. It has been taken to be THE ONE WAY. It is almost invisible , even today, because of its wide spread acceptance. An increasing number of people call it the "patriarchal paradigm." Most don't call it anything. They don't see it as the set of cultural beliefs they have absorbed. To them,  it's just the way things are.

The second paradigm is the matristic one; matristic coming from the Latin word for Mother, " mater." It is NOT the female version of the patriarchy. It is NOT matriarchy--women ruling, instead of men. It is a whole new way of looking at life and of being alive that is constituting a  revolution.

Now, in the 60s and 70s, the "equality" many women pursued  was to try and force themselves to be like men. They accepted the patriarchal paradigm (which is still dominant today, but receding.)

They thought being like men and being accepted into the old boys club would mean FREEDOM for them. So they succeeded in a way; they got the jobs and are a tiny bit closer to equal pay, BUT they are still not recognizing that as females we have a natural predisposition towards some extremely valuable human qualities that the patriarchal paradigm does not include.

These are: inner directedness, revelation, intuition, high valuation of emotions, compassion, love,  high valuation of children, individual creative expression,  playfulness, Nature, cooperation, an inner connection to one's own Divine Self, connection with other realities , knowing the symbolic nature of our reality , inner authority (self), knowingness, knowing of the infinitely exquisite organic organization and cooperation allowed from deeper levels of the Self, the high valuation of the individual, diversity and FREEDOM.

Of course men have these traits as well, but in general, they are recessive. Their dominant traits are: high valuation of intellect, reason, science, technology, external authority, strength, self promotion, strong ego, seeing the surface if things, intense short range planning, force, separation, againstness, external organization through rules, regulations and law, high valuation of conformity, groupness, sameness, hierarchical organization and rankings of importance, reliance on the intellect for organization, the belief that males are better and more important than females and children.

Females have the essential positive masculine traits as well, but they are recessive in them generally speaking. . Both the positive and negative aspects of the patriarchal paradigm have been brought to the forefront in both genders in our modern culture. So most women have adopted much of the patriarchal paradigm...for better or worse.

Returning to the 70's,   many of the Feminist oriented women could not see past the "glamour" of the patriarchal paradigm; they fought their way into being accepted by the club. Many of those have achieved degrees, rank, external importance and more money, but they also achieved the heart attacks, high blood pressure, constant chasing of the carrot, super-stress, over-achieverness, outer directedness, shortened life span and general angst of being out of alignment with their inner Divine Self. This all accompanies the keys to the club.

Having looked at how the patriarchal paradigm has played out for freedom-seeking women, I would now look at how it plays out for students.

The patriarchal paradigm can be seen clearly demonstrated in virtually every school extant today, including much homeschooling, many charter schools, colleges and graduate schools. The patriarchal paradigm says:

1. Thought shalt not trust yourself and thought shalt not be free. You MUST  go to school and you MUST learn what the patriarchally subscribed administration and faculty who are (seemingly)  in control deems important to learn.

2. And you will conform to various other arbitrary rules that make you unhappy as well.

In the 60's, when I was in highschool, girls had to wear skirts and boys pants.  And we conformed to this and many other arbitrary gender based rules. Succeeding generations rebelled and things changed, sometimes for the better, sometimes for the worse. But the new generation has the intelligence  and freedom (which past generations helped to create)to look at what is NOT working, and to allow for better.

I was on the leading edge back in the 60's and 70's . There was a great upsurge   in the taking back of freedoms. Cracks began to appear in the patriarchal paradigm of conformity to what came from outside of the self. I became a hippie; It was a  glorious time!

One important upshot  of the times was that  "free schools" proliferated. They allowed children to be free. They trusted children and the child's intuitive knowing of what they wanted and didn't want. No adult was allowed to force them to try and learn a required subject. Nor were they forced to even GO to school.

The Natural Feminine paradigm says "complete freedom" is essential for happy children in order to achieve their highest intelligence--not just intellectual left brain intelligence as is mostly taught in schools today--but right brain  intelligence , including emotional honesty with self and others, and creative freedom. Curriculums were designed by each child for themselves. Any sort of apparel they chose was allowed...including no clothes at the old swimming hole. And feelings were deemed to be EXTREMELY important.

Emotional intelligence is the most important kind of intelligence today as always, but it is  not officially sanctioned by the cultural and rational mind sets. It is not yet accepted  by the culture as a whole. Feminine intelligence  knows the importance of this acceptance of the vast importance of allowing one's own  emotions, even while respecting those of others.

My 15 year old granddaughter knows about the problems with school as it is today. She is a student at Morse. As she put it one time..."cram 2000 kids into a concrete box and tell them can't get out and that they must do what they are told... what's wrong with this picture?"

What's wrong is that small children LOVE  to learn. But as "teaching" is rammed down their throats. Many learn to hate it , and school , by their teen years at the latest. Many enjoy the social aspect, but not all. Some enjoy the academics, but they pay a hidden price.

Those who play the game well are given great approval and external rewards. But the truly strong ones resist it and continue to try and assert their inner sense of what is right for them, as does my granddaughter.

So the kids today still have enough of their Feminine mind left (both genders are born with it) to see some of what's wrong at school and how it could be better.

Another time my granddaughter, who is one of the strong ones,  said, "Nothing is more important than feelings. The schools should be teaching all about this." BRAVA!

So to many teens today, not just at Morse but all across the world today, "Gender Equality" is the rallying cry. And at Morse one rallying point of gender freedom has been the graduation gown color.

My granddaughter recently suggested on Facebook that a graduation gown of both blue and white might work. Good solution.

I would take it even further though. I would suggest that if freedom is the bottom line...and it is...that 3 gowns, one blue, one white, one blue and white...PLUS...the option to not wear a gown AT ALL, or even to ATTEND graduation,  be offered.

So, to those who ask, who cares ? I answer...a great many of us do. Old and young. We want  to be free to be whoever and however we want to be. The color of the graduation gown is one small issue, but its discussion is a VERY important step towards FREEDOM.

We know that this sort of discussion is our best hope for a happier human race and a vastly more peaceful world.

.

"Blue or white; who cares?" you asked rhetorically in your 4/14 editorial. I will answer as if you were really asking.

I care. I am 70, and in the 70's I worked for Womens Equlity. Not for "equality" per se, as many did, but i wanted Womens Rights. I worked for women's  legal and spiritual rights.

Today the young people work for Gender Equality.

Now, to me, equality in both movements  suggests that both genders are the same, and while I accept that both genders share a common humanity, I felt and still feel that there are valuable  differences.

 These differences have expressed themselves culturally as 2 different paradigms.

The first paradigm is so big and so bright that it is hard to see. It has been taken to be THE ONE WAY. It is almost invisible , even today, because of its wide spread acceptance. An increasing number of people call it the "patriarchal paradigm." Most don't call it anything. They don't see it as the set of cultural beliefs they have absorbed. To them,  it's just the way things are.

The second paradigm is the matristic one; matristic coming from the Latin word for Mother, " mater." It is NOT the female version of the patriarchy. It is NOT matriarchy--women ruling, instead of men.

But in the 60s and 70s, the "equality" many women pursued  was to try and force themselves to be like men. They accepted the patriarchal paradigm (which is still dominant today, but receding.)

They thought being like men and being accepted into the old boys club would mean FREEDOM for them. So they succeeded in a way; they got the jobs and are a tiny bit closer to equal pay, BUT they are still not recognizing that as females we have a natural predisposition towards some extremely valuable human qualities that the patriarchal paradigm does not include.

These are: revelation, intuition, high valuation of emotions, compassion, love,  high valuation of children, individual creative expression,  playfulness, Nature, cooperation, an inner connection to one's own Divine Self, connection with other realities , knowing the symbolic nature of our reality , inner authority (self), knowingness, knowing of the infinitely exquisite organic organization and cooperation allowed from deeper levels of the Self, the high valuation of the individual, diversity and FREEDOM.

Of course men have these traits as well, but in general, they are recessive. Their dominant traits are: high valuation of intellect, reason, science, technology, external authority, strength, self promotion, strong ego, seeing the surface if things, intense short range planning, force, separation, againstness, external organization through rules, regulations and law, high valuation of conformity, groupness, sameness, hierarchical organization and rankings of importance, reliance on the intellect for organization,
the belief that males are better and more important than females (or children).


Females have the essential positive traits as well, but they are recessive in them, to a degree. Both the positive and negative aspects of the patriarchal paradigm have been brought to the forefront in both genders in our modern culture. So most women have adopted much of the patriarchal paradigm...for better or worse.

Returning to the 70's,   many of the Feminist oriented women could not see past the "glamour" of the patriarchal paradigm; they fought their way into being accepted by the club. Many of those have achieved degrees, rank, external importance and more money, but they also achieved the heart attacks, high blood pressure, constant chasing of the carrot, super-stress, over-achieverness, outer directedness, shortened life span and general angst of being out of alignment with their inner Divine Self. This all accompanies the keys to the club.


Having looked at how the patriarchal paradigm has played out for freedom-seeking women, I would now look at how it plays out for students.

The patriarchal paradigm can be seen clearly demonstrated in virtually every school extant today, including much homeschooling, many charter schools, colleges and graduate schools. The patriarchal paradigm says:

1. Thought shalt not trust yourself and thought shalt not be free. You MUST  go to school and you MUST learn what the patriarchally subscribed administration and faculty who are (seemingly)  in control believes is important to learn.

2. And you will conform to various other arbitrary rules that make you unhappy as well.

In the 60's, when I was in highschool girls had to wear skirts and boys pants.  And we conformed to this and many other arbitrary gender based rules. Suceeding generations rebelled and things changed, sometimes for the better, sometimes for the worse. But the new generation has the intelligence  and freedom (which past generations hekpef to create)to look at what is NOT working, and to allow for better.

I was on the leading edge. Back in the 60's and 70's there was a great upsurge of freedom. Cracks began to appear in the patriarchal paradigm of conformity to what came from outside of the self. I became a hippie; It was a  glorious time!

One important upshot  of the times was that  "free schools" proliferated. They allowed children to be free. They trusted children and the child's intuitive knowing of what they wanted and didn't want. No adult was allowed to force them to try and learn a required subject. Nor were they forced to even GO to school.

The Natural Feminine paradigm says "complete freedom" is essential for happy children in order to achieve their highest intelligence--not just intellectual left brain intelligence as is mostly taught in schools today--but right brain  intelligence , including emotional honesty with self and others, and creative freedom. Curriculums were designed by each child for themselves. Any sort of apparel they chose was allowed...including no clothes at the old swimming hole. And feelings were deemed to be EXTREMELY important.

Emotional intelligence is the most important kind of intelligence today as always, but it is  not officially sanctioned by the cultural and rational mind sets. It is not yet accepted  by the culture as a whole. Feminine intelligence  knows the importance of this acceptance of the vast importance of allowing one's own  emotions, even while respecting those of others.

 My 15 year old granddaughter knows about the problems with school as it is today. She is a student at Morse. As she put it one time..."cram 2000 kids into a concrete box and tell them can't get out and that they must do what they are told... what's wrong with this picture?"

 What's wrong is that small children LOVE  to learn. But as it is rammed down their throats, many learn to hate it and school by their teen years at the latest. Many enjoy the social aspect, but not all. Some enjoy the academics, but they pay a hidden price.

Those who play the game well are given great approval and external rewards. But the truly strong ones resist it and continue to try and assert their inner sense of what is right for them, as does my granddaughter.

So the kids today still have enough of their Feminine mind left (both genders are born with it) to see some of what's wrong at school and how it could be better.

Another time my granddaughter, who is one of the strong ones,  said, "Nothing is more important than feelings. The schools should be teaching tall about this." BRAVA!

So to many teens today, not just at Morse but all across the world today, "Gender Equality" is the rallying cry. And at Morse one rallying point of gender freedom has been the graduation gown color.

My granddaughter recently suggested on Facebook that a graduation gown of both blue and white might work. Good solution.

I would take it even further though. I would suggest that if freedom is the bottom line...and it is...that 3 gowns, one blue, one white, one blue and white...PLUS...the option to not wear a gown AT ALL, or even to ATTEND graduation,  be offered.

So, to those who ask, who cares ? I answer...a great many of us do. Old and young. We want  to be free to be whoever and however we want to be. The color of the graduation gown is one small issue, but its discussion is a VERY important step towards FREEDOM.

We know that this sort of discussion is our best hope for a happier human race and a vastly more peaceful world.




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